Is your email in-box clogged with messages from people purporting to be your friends? If so, how do you get any work done without ignoring their messages and risking the dissolution of your friendships?
Here’s my solution: Rather than alienate my friends, I read every message I receive— but only up to the point where I realize that the sender doesn’t know me very well, and maybe not at all.
Consider a sampling (below) of genuine email messages I’ve received over the past five days. In each case, I’ve provided the entire text of the message, up to the point where I hit the “delete” button.
From Ronna McDaniel, chair of the Republican National Committee:
Friend,
After reviewing the profiles of our Party’s most loyal supporters, one thing became clear: You’ve earned the status of a REPUBLICAN LIVING LEGEND…
From Kellyanne Conway:
Friend,
When the RNC asked me to reach out to some of our most dedicated supporters regarding the RNC’s 2023 Platform Audit, your name IMMEDIATELY came to mind….
From Adam Schiff:
Hey Daniel,
Being able to stay in touch with you is so important to me.
My team and I work very hard to stay in communication with our supporters because you are such a vital part of our movement…
From Truthout:
Corporate media may have exponentially larger budgets than Truthout, but we have the support of people like you…
From Marco Rubio:
Marco Rubio has a confidential message for Dan Rottenberg only. If you are not Dan Rottenberg, please delete this memo…
From Kevin Tordoff of Americans United For Life:
Friend,
A baby is born – alive – after surviving an attempted abortion.
But what happens next is not the same in all places … because, friend, that precious baby’s life is NOT YET protected in all 50 states!...
From James Comer:
Fellow Conservative….
From Stephen Miller of America First Legal (former Trump White House Aide):
Fellow Patriot,…..
From Vivek Ramaswamy,
Fellow American,…..
From Team America:
Patriot,
Tucker Carlson is one of the MOST IMPORTANT truth-tellers in America…
From Dr. Ben Carson:
Hello,
I feel like our culture has forgotten—or ignored—some very important and basic lessons when it comes to the development of human life.
Our society has been infected by an anti-life ideology, treating its most vulnerable members as disposable objects. Abortion that was once thought of as a last resort in a medical emergency has become the new normal.
Medicine tells us that life begins at the moment of conception…..
From Jim Jordan:
Hey folks, this is Jim Jordan.
I only have a moment between meetings, but I wanted to remind you that….
From Dr. Ben Carson:
Fellow American,
There is a very concerning trend occurring in our country that has me worried for Americans who hold to biblical & faith-based values….
From Donald Trump:
Friend,
How would you like to have dinner with your favorite president?....
From Candace Owens:
Friend,
This is the most personal and vulnerable email I have ever sent you….
From Ron Johnson:
Friend,
As one of my most loyal supporters, I wanted to send you this personal message….
From Kevin McCarthy:
Patriot,
It’s Kevin McCarthy. Because you are one of our TOP patriots, I am giving you one last chance to renew your 2023 House Majority Membership …..
From Rep. Andy Biggs:
Hello Friend,
I’m sure you’d agree that we can’t count on D.C. politicians and bureaucrats to fix our education system by throwing out the radicals in charge…
From Donald Trump:
Friend,
As one of my biggest supporters, I couldn’t be more thrilled to offer YOU this special opportunity….
From Senator Josh Hawley:
Friend,
As a leading voice in the Conservative movement, I’m counting on YOU to complete the May Republican Platform Audit and represent your fellow Patriots in YOUR City….
From Kevin McCarthy:
Patriot,
I value your support and expertise— that's why I'm inviting you to my very first Annual GOP Speaker's Survey….
From thosoezwmhn:
Are you tired of swiping through profiles that don't quite match your interests? Have you been looking for a more authentic and meaningful connection?
As someone from Ukraine, I know how difficult it can be to find someone who truly understands you. That's why I wanted to introduce you to a dating website that connects Western men with Ukrainian women who are looking for genuine relationships….
From Jessica Anderson of Heritage Action:
Fellow Conservative…..
From David Horowitz:
I’m writing you this email today because I’ve learned critical information about the far-left’s plan to turn America into a socialist nation…..
From Dr. Ben Carson:
Fellow Patriot,
This is Dr. Ben Carson, and I’m writing to you today because your name is on my list of Americans who cherish our nation’s guiding values of life, liberty, community, and faith…
From GOP Headquarters:
Friend,
Democrats are actively promoting socialist policies that threaten to undermine our economy and way of life….
From Senate GOP:
Friend,
President Trump went on CNN Wednesday and directly faced the American people and the Liberal mainstream media.
You’re a trusted supporter and one of the most reliable patriots in YOUR state, Friend….
From Team Scalise:
Drop whatever you’re doing!....
From Arthur Yellin:
I wouldn't mind having dinner with my favorite President, but he's been dead a LONG time!
From Robert Zaller:
Well, you told me to stop using passenger pigeons to send in my copy, and look where it's got us. Fortunately, I've still got my quill around somewhere—I'll ask Chatbot to find it for me.